As we all know, February is the month of love. As a single girl it’s so hard to escape this fact because it’s everywhere and although it doesn’t upset me personally (hey, it’s just another day, right?) I know that some people do find it hard. So I’ve decided to bring you Valentines from a single girls point of view. A few posts over the next few weeks talking about love and dating, but from someone who isn’t in a relationship. They won’t be all about how I spend my evenings sat at home drinking squash and playing Take Me Out on Gala Bingo, I promise. However there will be minimal mushiness because I don’t really have someone to be mushy about (apart from Little Miss, but that’s a different kind of love and I do have a post idea dedicated to that, so look out for it!) There will be no gift guides, no special romantic weekend suggestions, or anything like that and on February 14th I will be telling you all about my plan to tackle the scary world of dating as I feel it’s time to get back on the metaphorical horse, or bike.. whichever it is.
Today however, I’m going to tell you a bit about my best and worst dates in the history of all my dating life. Apart from occasionally mentioning my traumatic experience with my daughter’s father, I really haven’t touched much on men and dating on the blog, which is probably because it’s not really much of my life anymore. But it used to be. Love and men used to be a huge part of my life prior to becoming a mother, in fact I think I quite possibly demented my friends with my endless search for Prince Charming and all the heartbreak that went along with it! For an almost twenty six year old who didn’t have her first boyfriend until seventeen, I’ve dated my fair share of men. Some relationships lasting weeks, others months and a couple even years. But through that all, I haven’t actually had many “dates” so when asked by Best British Bloggers to pick my best and/or worst dates, I did struggle. However, I’ve managed it. Rather than pick to share only my best or only my worst, I thought i’d share with both. Starting with the worst which happened when I was relatively new to the dating world at eighteen.
I’ll mention no names, but if you’re reading this, I’m sorry. But to be fair, a few weeks after this bad date, you broke my heart.
The worst date I ever had was….
First year of university I developed this crazy crush on a third year i’d met in freshers week. In the second semester after a drunken tryst I’d finally started to go on dates with him. In my opinion, we were perfect for each other and the dates we’d had so far, I’d had a lot of fun. Anyway, one Sunday he invited me out for a roast dinner with some of his friends. I’d met most of these on various nights out so I wasn’t really nervous and the first part of the afternoon went swimmingly. But then his ex turned up. I was quiet, but friendly but she clearly didn’t like me and to make matters worse she was all over him! Back at eighteen I was pretty awkward, and as I mentioned quiet so I didn’t say anything but I did feel pretty crappy! But it got worse. He was scheduled in to do a stand up routine. I’m not a stranger to stand up comedy, in fact I enjoy a lot of stand up comedians, but no matter how much I liked him, this was dreadful. I have seen some bad amateur stand up comedy since in Edinburgh at the Fringe and even on holiday in New York. But he was by far the worst, I don’t think anyone laughed and I cringed the whole way through it. It was such an uncomfortable atmosphere and I have to admit I felt so bad afterwards I didn’t even know what to say to him! We walked him in silence and that was that. If that had been a first date, it would of been a deal breaker, it was awful. However since I’d already had a few dates and I did genuinely like him, I was able to move past it, until he out of the blue dropped me for that ex who hated me and I threw a book at him and kicked a metal gate resulting in a broken toe… but that’s another story.
The best date I ever had was…..
After getting out a three year relationship with my ex, I was twenty two, dropped down to a size eight and feeling great about myself. I developed a crush on a guy I worked with. We had so much in common and it turned out he liked me too. After weeks of speculation and coaxing from our work colleagues we finally penciled in a day off work for our big date. He took me to a Japanese restaurant and we had a big sushi plate between us as well as a few drinks. The conversation flowed and we had such a good laugh. We had chemistry and I felt really good for the first time since my break up, a few months earlier. After dinner we went for a drink at the local vodka revs. Since both of us worked behind the bar and spent a lot of our shifts inventing cocktails, it was nice to drink them together for real. The table had a candle on and I spent a lot of time prodding the wax in it while we talked. We left when the place started to get rowdy and he walked me home. As we walked he pulled out the candle and handed it to me as something to remember our date by. It was the most romantic thing anyone had done for me in years, stolen me a red candle. I still have that candle and despite the fact we didn’t work out (I’d like to say it was because I was on the rebound, but he actually turned out to be gay, we’re still good friends to this day) I always think of this date fondly as it was exactly how I imagined dates to be. Dinner, drinks and good company.
And now i’m going to leave you all with this. Despite the crushing fear that I’m going to die alone, for the first time since puberty, I’m not even that sad that I’m single. At least I have a whole double bed to myself!
What are the best and worst dates you’ve ever had?
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